I could not have anticipated the outpouring that would follow my raw post on our son who survived two disrupted adoptions! My "inbox" was brimming with email just 24 hours after posting. I clicked each email with one eye closed bracing for the harsh criticism that often comes with discussing such a sensitive issue as adoption disruption. Much to my relief, there were only two sorts of emails. The first sort came from supportive friends and family members who know us "in real life" and wanted to share how deeply the post touched them. The second sort of email is the sort that haunts me. There were many notes from despondent parents struggling to raise a wounded adopted child. I wept over many of those emails. I prayed for each family who took the time to write. I wanted more than anything to offer those parents "three easy steps to fixing your child". I have nothing by way of advice except to seek the face of your Heavenly Father, day by day, moment by moment and ask Him to give you the grace to get through just that day or that hour or even that minute. To disrupt or not to disrupt is a question each family must answer for itself. For us, it was almost the right answer but turned out not to be. For other families, it is the only way to save their sanity or protect other children in the home (or themselves, for that matter).
To all who read our story, encouraged me, asked permission to share it with other parents and shared your own fragile stories, you have shored us up. Linking arms with fellow parents and marching forward is a priceless part of our own family healing.
We have come so far and have far to go but I can honestly say, with a dramatic swipe of my brow . . .
"phew . . . THAT was a close one!".
For His Great Fame,
Nikki and the Crew
