The Giver, Not the Gift

This is quite possibly the only post of this nature I will ever write.

First, because it GREATLY contradicts my philosophy on missions and guilt and friendships and money. It's uncomfortable.

And, second, because I vowed early on never to be "that" missionary but here I go . . .

A couple of months ago, I was listening to a podcast by David Platt. He is NOT the guy you want to listen to if you enjoy  complacency in your faith walk or if your comfort zone is a place  you've planned to occupy until there's nothing left to binge watch.

Yes, the guy who wrote "Radical". That's the one.

So, he quoted Leonard Ravenhill, a British pastor who was openly critical of the First World church until his death in 1994.  And here is the quote:

Cringy? Convicting? Annoying?  It's going to hit different people in different ways.

I PROMISED early on in the life of our ministry here in The Philippines that I would not be that missionary. . .you know the one.  The one who comments about how giving up your Latte for a month could provide clean water for the Hookabooka people for seven centuries (I made that up but you know the type).  I very much do not want to be the missionary that makes her friends feel guilty for going to Disney World six times a year while kids languish in the streets of Asia eating from trash cans.

I'm not the Holy Spirit. 

I don't convict people.

I don't decide how fellow Believers distribute their God-given resources. 

But IF this quote by Ravenhill is to be believed, the Body of Christ has to do better.  We have to.

That includes me.  

I know what you're thinking. 

"Ah, giving must be low at Mercy House right now so it's time for Nikki to pull out the big guns".

And I respond to that,

"Not at all. This is not about our ministry alone and it's not about  'getting more money' out of

first world Believers. 

It's highly probable that I'm "preaching to the choir" here because the people who take the time to read a blog post about missions are probably already giving sacrificially, serving locally and praying fervently for the gospel to go out worldwide.  

This post is for YOU.  First world Christ followers. It is solely intended to benefit you. Not our ministry or any other ministry.

Check this out:

I recently did a short study on Philippians.  Chapter four contains a couple of the most quoted (and misquoted) scriptures in the Bible. One of them is Philippians 4:19 which reads

"and my God will supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory in 

Christ Jesus"

Missionaries LOVE that verse.  Anything that reminds us that God cares about our needs and will supply them is balm to our living-on -love gifts souls.

But Paul did not write that verse for himself or his fellow missionaries. That scripture was for his supporters!  Read the whole chapter. Paul is praising the church at Philippi for being his ONLY supporting church and reminding them he is not seeking more "stuff" from them but that he is seeking the fruit of the gospel.  Paul reminds the church at Philippi that the fruit of his work is to THEIR credit. 

How beautiful is that?  

The gospel goes out and the messenger is not given the credit but the ones who support the messenger are.  

I love God's economy.  

It's nothing like the world's.

The "silent partners" are the ones in the spotlight . They are the ones for whom God will "supply every need".  

That makes my heart sing. 

How desperately I want the Lord to bless every Believer who invests in missions. And His word says He will. He will provide for your needs as you provide for those who GO.

As I type this blog post, my mind travels to some precious faces in the First World. I imagine you sitting down at your computer and clicking on our web site to give. I imagine you writing a check, getting a stamp and giving "old school" through the regular mail as you think of us and share your resources with people thousands of miles away who don't have their basic needs met and who do not know the saving love of Jesus.

And I am smiling right now.

I don't know if the quote by Leonard Ravenhill is true. I suspect for many it is. 

But for those who do sacrifice for global missions, I believe God IS providing for your needs. He said he would.  His word is trustworthy. 

And if God has pricked your heart while reading this blog post, can I ask one tiny favor?

Don't stop feeding your pets! 

From One Orphanage To The Next

I recently heard a statement from a friend who is in the child caring world that shocked and saddened me.  This friend stated that when big families adopt, it's like the children going "from one orphanage to another".  The following blog post is decidedly bias. Just know that.

WAIT. WHAT?

That was her exact statement, verbatim. I sat  in confusion for a few seconds but thought to "fix my face" before she looked back at me.  I considered my own family of six children - four adopted and two biological - and wondered if she meant me.  Or someone else. Is six "orphanage numbers" or was that comment only directed at the mega families of 9, 10, 11 or 17 children?  

I said nothing. Because I was offended and didn't want to say something I might regret. 

And then I decided to try and be very diplomatic and evaluate her words carefully, considering the people I know "in real life" who have adopted children and large families, and since I direct and live inside of an orphanage, it was easy for me to compare the two scenarios.  

I see, in some aspects, how she is right. In both my orphanage and the large families I  know well,  there are some glaring similarities:  lots of people, piles of laundry, big grocery bills, the need to take turns in the bathroom, fights over TV shows, the last cookie being a big deal ,  running out of toilet paper at lightening speed , people having to wait a little while to be heard, a fair amount of chores for each child to simply keep the place running . . . and those are different and maybe harder paths than small families walk.  

But then I weighed some other similarities: always someone to play with, likely at least one person to take your side, a dying to self that creates good character when the "me, first" attitude has to go, older siblings to teach younger siblings everything from swimming to shoe tying, younger siblings to teach older siblings to be loving caregivers, a place to try out your gifts and talents in front of a larger audience, and ultimately, more people to love and be loved by. 

And the implication in the statement was that placing my precious Mercy House children into a large family was somehow a disservice to them.    That maybe just keeping them in the first orphanage was sufficient if no small families were considering them  since a large family is pretty much an orphanage.

That,  my friends, is a lie! 

 If I know one thing, I KNOW orphanage life. I believe I run a pretty wonderful orphanage. I truly love the children in our center. I kiss them goodnight and make sure all their needs are met. They are happy, growing, thriving people who are getting to know Jesus and are safe from harm. They LOVE their lives here.  They count. Their opinions matter.  I sit up with sick ones and hold crying ones. 

But I would never even try to submit that my orphanage is better than or even equal to a large family. 

You see, parents in large families, there are some things YOU can give my children that I can not.

A new family tree.  A last name that matches yours. A group of siblings who will be there for him long after you and I are gone. Not leaving for their own adoptive homes.  A place to bring his own children someday that is his REAL home and a family that is his REAL family. Grandparents, cousins, crazy uncles!!! 

We at Mercy House are LIKE a family.                             You, my friends ARE a family.

Don't let anyone discourage you, Mothers of Many, from following your dream of adopting a child. Or a sibling group.  

And you, my fellow orphanage director friends, please consider those large families and don't dismiss them simply based on numbers. Really SEE them.  Each individual member.  I realize some of the children in care NEED to be in a smaller family for a number of reasons. But I truly believe that almost any child can succeed and thrive in a large family. Sometimes better. 

So, if you ever hear a statement  like my colleague made above, whether you are in a large family yourself, a single person or married with one dog and two fish, please defend big families. 

In a world that celebrates all kind of families, let's not forget the large ones. 

You have so much to offer! 

Where's The "Radical"?

I read a quote from John Piper this week, one of my favorite authors and teachers.  The quote said:

                            "to prospective missionaries, Jesus says, "i promise to work for and be
                             for you so much that you will not be able to speak of having
                             sacrificed anything." -piper


And I had to "AMEN" out loud, share it on my facebook and do a little research to make sure Dr. Piper actually said it in the first place. 

I have not read anything I've so staunchly agreed with like this, aside from the Bible itself, for a long time.

It made me ask myself "WHERE IS THE RADICAL?".

I remember having a giggly, girly type conversation with my BFF, Thea once. We talked about how "radical" some people think big families are or families who adopt older children.  We agreed together that neither of us - her with her zillion kids and me with my multiple adoptions- felt very "radical". Only blessed and hungry for more.     We thought maybe we weren't doing it right. 

Many of you have read the book to which I am referring.  "Radical" is a Christan best seller in which Dr. David Platt encourages Believers not to buy into the American dream of safety, comfort and material wealth while the rest of the world lives in poverty and often without Christ.   That book was a game changer for my husband and I.   It was the impetus to adopting our then 15 year old son.
 It was the catalyst to us increasing our financial giving, getting out of debt and it's what helped solidify our already wet-cement plans to sell our worldly goods in exchange for a life serving  in The Philippines. God used that book to help us shore up and rebuild some simmering-below-the-surface truth that needed to be turned up to a full boil.

So here I sit, typing away in The Philippines with seven children, a growing ministry to special needs orphans, thousands of miles from my parents, siblings and closest friends  and I ask the question again:

WHERE IS THE "RADICAL"?    

One issue the book did not address and I made some huge assumptions about was the PAIN that would be involved in exchanging our former life for this new one.

I expected it to hurt.  A lot. 

We don't own anything in America anymore. No car. No house. Not even a bicycle or a tent.  I've always enjoyed my "stuff" and I truly expected the selling off part to hurt more.  I had a hard day after the yard sale because reality came full force. It's kind of like that decision to cut your long hair short. After the first big "CHOP", there's a secondary panic.    I had that.  
And then it went away as fast as it came.

The work here is hard.  It's hot. It's paperwork-intensive.  Our finances are dwindling.  I've had intestinal parasites. I don't know how to drive here so I'm utterly dependent on my husband.   We've had many typhoons. The traffic is brutal.
Let's see .  . . any more complaints?    Oh yes, we've had things stolen from us and I never get time alone. The bugs here are huge. The geckos in my house are pink, rubbery and dart out close to you when you least expect it. One of my kids is getting over impetigo even as I type.
I think that's all.
No . .. wait . . . there's no toilet paper in public places here and no rims on the seats. There is no dollar store. No Aldi.
There. That about covers it!  

But even so . . . the JOY of serving the children in our care overrides the BUMMER of the facts I just listed.

WHERE IS THE "RADICAL"?

I think I had it all wrong.  Radical living doesn't hurt.  It produces abundance, a closer walk with my savior, an inter-dependence on my family and a life filled with purpose and clear direction.  

It has hard parts and draw backs.  It has down sides and "if onlys" .   That's not the same as the  agony I expected. 

This isn't MARTYRDOM,  it's privilege.   A high honor and a GIFT that I don't feel deserving of.

Please don't think for one second my attitude toward this life on the mission field has anything to do with ME.
I am NOT awesome!
I am NOT super patient!
I am NOT  'outdoorsy" or a "risk taker"!

I like to lay in bed with a chocolate bar and a good book just like the next girl.  
I do that here sometimes. The chocolate here is really good.  

But as I ask, actually BEG,  my Heavenly Father to take my heart and mind and place it in submission to Him, things look a lot different.

And I started poking   around in God's word for some information on why I'm not struggling more.   

Of course, I started with Paul.  He really suffered for the sake of the gospel! Beatings, imprisonment, exile, 
abandonment by some who claimed to be for him . . . and here's is what he said:

  ¹¹ Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. ¹² I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need. ¹³ I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Philippians 4

And THIS from a man who had issues bigger than bad traffic and rubbery geckos! 

Another lesson learned.  Another misconception righted.

"Radical" is not synonymous with "painful",  "torturous" or "being turned inside out".
THOSE things were at their peak before we ever left US soil.  The prying from our clenched fists has been a lifetime in
the making. One. Finger. At. A. Time.  YEARS.  Refined by adopting.  Polished by hard things. Molded by jumping off the cliff and praying the Catcher really DID say "jump".

In the thesaurus of my ever-learning heart, "Radical" is followed by "rising above", "contentment", "ultimate purpose"
and "unmatched peace".

Maybe in a year, things will be hard and awful.  Maybe I'll get to wear a martyr's crown and can, in complete truth, cry rivers of self pity.  Maybe I'll be packing my family and going back to my first country. 

Whatever He says, I pray I will do.  Wherever He sends, I pray I will go.

There is a RADICAL JOY in RADICAL living!