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Friday, February 26, 2010

The Beginning of the Beginning

My family met Ezequiel for the first time just a few hours ago! He is, in the words of my 13 year old daughter "so adorable". I called the orphanage just about the time my family arrived and I could hear Ezequiel crying in the background. He is, as all his paperwork indicates, a shy child. He is keenly aware of everyone around him and he is steadfastly devoted to one particular caregiver, Thelma. There were tears all around yesterday and I imagine not all of them happy. Thelma has cared for Ezequiel his whole life. The orphanage has a low staff to child ratio and certainly the bonds of motherhood were already firmly in place between Ezequiel and Thelma. I can not thank God enough for her. I am sure that, because of Thelma, our risk of attachment problems are minimal. I am certain that Ezequiel's physical and emotional health are far beyond what they would be due to her loving care. I am praying that God fills her heart with peace in the midst of her sadness. I have always said that in adoption, someone has to lose before anyone can win. Birthmom lost her son, Thelma lost her baby, and Ezequiel lost all that is familiar. I am ready for all of us to move on to the "winning" phase in which new family bonds are forged forever and those who loved him first can heal completely. God does not promise that obedience is easy or painless but it is always best. I realize that's easy for me to say. I get Ezequiel for life. My highest respect is reserved for those who know they are bound for sadness and heartache but do what they are called to do anyway.

9 comments:

  1. So very excited for you Nikki! Thanks for sharing!

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  2. Nikki,
    What a moving post. It reminds me of Renee Swope meeting Aster's birth mother before she left Ethiopia. It was a bitter sweet gift. Ezequiel is a blessed boy to have such a tender-hearted mom. You guys will be in our prayers during the transition time, and I can't wait to get my lips on those sweet cheeks!

    Amy

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  3. Thank you for this post Nikki. Being new to this whole adoption process, I glean much wisdom from moms like you who are open and honest about the joys and sadness of adopting. I'll be praying for Thelma and Ezekiel as they experience this parting. I'm also praying that Nadia has someone who has shown her love and care so she is familiar with that type of attachment as well. :)

    Kristin

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  4. What a wonderful post. I thought of this, too, as I could tell that Jay-R was very much loved at his orphanage. Congrats on new beginnings!

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  5. Nikki,
    Such a true picture of adoption! I am happy for you all, but the sadness is so hard at first. Praying for you all!

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  6. Loved seeing the pics via facebook. I'm so excited for your family!!!! Thanks for sharing this journey.
    Trish

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  7. Very well said. What giving people these caregivers are. To not know when or if "their" kids will ever be adopted. Much love to you guys!
    Lea

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  8. I'm so glad your family has arrived there. So sweet that Zeke is loved. I know orphanage workers were very sad when we picked up Caleb.
    Joy

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  9. So excited for you all! Praise God!

    Love, Stacey

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