"I am absolutely loving this time of year. It's hot and humid and practically every day is capped off by an evening thunderstorm or rain shower.
In spite of all the joy, I have little peace. I committed the cardinal sin of reading through Christian Adoption Service's latest list of waiting children. Those of you who know me at all know exactly where this post is headed . . . yes, I am hopelessly in love with a child on the list. I have his file. I know it by heart. He is older (almost 15) and had a very rough start in life. He is in a Christian orphanage, loves Jesus, plays music, sings and even has an "emo" haircut like my oldest son. He ages out in one year and will be unadoptable."
I went on to discuss how there was no way the Inter Country Adoption Board would allow us to start the process so soon after Ezekiel's adoption, and how we were still recovering financially from Zeke's adoption anyway. I went on to lament that my husband was not ready to adopt again . .. blah, blah blah . . . I'll bet the whole time I'm typing the Lord is looking at me with a shrug and thinking "maybe you should ask ME what I think about this adoption"!
Isn't that CRAZY? This post was written only three months after Ezekiel came home and several months before the ICAB consented to allow us to pursue Francis' adoption! Now I know more than just his FILE by heart, I know his voice, his mannerisms, his accent, so many things that the pieces of paper could not convey. I know how perfectly he's going to fit in over here. I know he never fully gave up hope as he waited for a family. I know he is ours. That was the plan all along. It couldn't be better. I can't grieve over the 15 years we didn't know him, I can only rejoice in the next 15 . . .or 50 . . . that we get to be present!
I KNOW that by the end of this month, Lord willing, we will be face to face!
Ephesians 3:20-21
English Standard Version (ESV)
